Sharing my Journey

I had the privilege of sharing my testimony at Cedarville University back on the 18th of October. I shared about "Leaving a Wake of JOY" through the storms of life. I'm working on the possibility of posting the video here on my blog, but for now you can click here to go to the university's Chapel Archive. In the search bar type in my name "Kristin Koning" or search for Oct 18 and it should pop up. You can listen to the audio version or watch the video which includes my powerpoint pictures and scripture. I pray it will be an encouragement to you...

All in Good Fun...

No explanation necessary...especially if you're a Kuhn! The caption was just perfect with her little hands on her hips showing a bit of attitude, dontcha think ;)

One out of 3 isn't so bad...Trent's joined the dark side...Drew's pretty neutral...so Anna has no choice but to stick with me on this one.

Boo...

But I still love you Mike & Trent...my silly brainwashed boys!

Happy 13th!

Just looking back at some pictures of this day 13 years ago! I posted some a few years ago here...

A fun little review of the last 13 years...

5 months

We braved the cold weather for our last chance at some outdoor pictures. My friend Jen met us at a nearby park and took some family shots for us! Can't wait to hang them up in our new house! We had to be out of our old house on Halloween...so we moved into a small rental for a month until we can move into our new home.

I grabbed a box from the rental garage before we left...we thought this picture was so appropriate for this time in her life...we've been living amidst boxes for a long time...looking forward to unpacking for good!

Overdue...

Can you believe I have been "silent" since February?

It's been hard to put everything out there...post all the dr visit updates...my feelings...

I've been doing some paper and pen journaling to record my thoughts this time instead.

Feeling a little more guarded.  Working on trusting the only One who is in Control...protecting myself, and you, from being so invested with all the details.

I know many of you have checked in several times over the last few months... and have found no new posts.

So today, I thought I'd share some of the pictures my friend, Kayte, from Legacy Portraits took a couple weeks ago.

It was one -on a short list- of baby steps I've been taking to "get excited" about nearing the end of my pregnancy and meeting this precious girl!!  I'm thankful for some sweet memories on a very sunny morning :)

Ok, just to clarify, I'm 35 weeks today.  The negotiating of Baby K's birthday has begun with my doc.  I know he will continue to gently push me to make it to 37+ weeks.  He'd like her to be about 6 lbs.  He said at my last appointment that waiting is like shuffleboard...we want to get as close to the edge without going over.  Of course, I've looked at the calendar - full of black ink and orange and yellow highlights- that show all the boy's baseball games, end of school, start of basketball camp, grad parties, family traveling in and available to take care of T & D etc... I think I know when would be ideal...we'll just have to see if baby and my doc and I can be patient enough to continue waiting for the best timing both physically and emotionally.

Meditating on some of these truths lately...

"We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name." -Ps 33:20

"As for God, His way is blameless...He is a shield to all who take refuge in Him. For who is God, but the Lord? And who is a rock except our God." - Ps 18:30-31 

 "Be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who hope in the Lord."  -Ps 31:24

"This is the day which the Lord has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it."  -Ps 118:24

 "For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother's womb...And in Your book were all written the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them."  -Ps 139:13-16

 {This is the little bear hat I made for Baby Koning...still working on the blanket to match.}

"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."  -Rom 15:13

The Wedding!

My brother Perry and new SIL Julie were married December 10.  Drew and I traveled to Ohio early to help with some last minute details...i.e. about 250 cupcakes and the rehearsal dinner :)  It was a lot of fun!!  We got to see family from out of town and hang out with my grandparents for a few days.

It was a beautiful ceremony and just an all around FUN weekend!!

Wish I had more pictures to share!  But here are a few...

 Yes, we took pics outside in the COLD...can't wait to see the professional ones!

New do...dew...du...

I decided to finally get my hair cut...I knew it had been since before Joanna was born.  So at least 8 months ago.  I don't think my hair had been that long since I was in college!  I'll be glad to get rid of the headaches when I put it up in a ponytail, though.  I don't think it will even go into a ponytail now.  Here is a quick before and after.  It's definately different, but a change is good every now and then.

Alabama

I'm gonna send you over to Jen's blog.  She posted a slideshow of pictures from our visit with the Palmers and the night of the Sav-a-Life Banquet.

Here are a few of my pictures...

ROAD TRIP

My mom and brother, Perry, picked me up last Friday and we headed to Iowa. The 8-9 hour car ride really wasn't too bad with 3 drivers. My cousin, who is stationed in Guam, flew "home" to get married. The weather was beautiful for the outdoor wedding. The scenery was lush and green. We stayed with a family from my uncle and aunt's church. My boys would have LOVED to explore around their farm!! I was able to snap a few shots at sunrise on Sunday morning while our host took our flat tire to the milk house to plug the hole! We were blessed to have hosts that could do just about anything! If we'd have been anywhere else, it would have been a much bigger and longer task! I don't think the donut tire would have lasted very long on all the gravel roads either.

A Break and A Blessing

My boys came back from Grandma's house today. It has been such a nice "time out" for me. I didn't get so much of "my list" accomplished, but it was a nice mental and emotional break. The boys had SO MUCH fun and I had some quiet time to rest, relax, read, think...and yes I did splurge for a pedicure :)

Another highlight for me was to go downtown with my dear friend Jen (and her new camera) to take some pictures. I can hardly believe that it has been 11 weeks ago since we thought we were taking the last pictures of our time with Joanna Claire. So...26 weeks and counting and it was definitely a milestone to document in pictures. It was a gift of time -wandering around, laughing, and capturing wonderful memories as I felt Joanna kick and move. Thank you, Jen, for your time, your encouragement, and your friendship.
We also swung by Lutheran Hospital to drop off the last of the "extra" photo books I had here at home. A nurse called the church to let us know they were all out! The staff are so thankful to be able to give these photo books to help moms continue to cherish the memories of their baby. Thanks to many of you who made these books and prayed for the moms and families who would receive them. Looks like we'll have to get together and make some more - maybe sometime in late August early September.

Tuesday I met with the doctor. Same old, same old...checked her heart, her head, her abdomen. Didn't get a good read on the heart rate - she's still falling right between 44-46 when I check at home. Fluid continues to accumulate. I asked if she was still measuring on schedule like she had at 20 weeks, but I was not so surprised to hear she is lagging behind now. Doctor's guess was about 21 weeks - though he only measured the head not the femur.

We mentioned we would be going to Michigan for a vacation in a couple weeks and he said, "Good, go. I think that's great." He'll send a copy of my records with us just in case anything should happen, but I'm not too nervous, I know God's timing is perfect and I'll just have to continue to trust Him. It was nice to get such positive approval from my doctor too!

He said when I get back in August he'd give steroids to me/baby to help her lungs develop. He mentioned briefly a couple scenarios we'd discuss in more detail if Joanna's heart is still beating come September. He mentioned he didn't want me to feel like an experiment, but that there was a procedure (he gave me the medical name, but I can not remember) where he could insert a needle into the baby's abdomen and take out some fluid. This would help me to be able to deliver naturally (because her belly is so bloated with fluid) and he said it'd be a whole lot easier to resuscitate her if they needed to after she was born. I'm not getting my hopes up, but it's nice to see him covering all the possible bases...God has shown his predictions to be wrong so many times - the doc has to be ready for anything with this little girl!

I'm amazed at the difference between the doctor in 2 1/2 years. When I saw him with Noah, my visits were so impersonal - in, out, quick, to the point, abrupt, even offensive at times. I no longer feel like a number, a record, or a file. He sees me as a mom, a wife, a MOTHER. He takes time to talk, process, and really listen to what we want. His attitude has changed - I know he respects our ethical choices (he did with Noah too), BUT he's CHOOSING to have a different attitude as he interacts with us. Little Joanna Claire is truly living up to her name, shining a light in that office that he is really grappling with. I marveled after this last appointment as I watched him step back toward the sink and away from the door and begin chit-chatting about our vacation and Michigan golf courses with Mike...wow, we've come a long way. I'm thankful for the changes in his thinking and that God continues to "let me in on" this transformation.

I guess that's about it for now. Thank you for caring about us. Thank you for taking the time to read our updates and bring our family before the Lord.
A verse comes to mind...2 Corinthians 12:9 "But He has said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness' Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." I'm thankful for the strength he gives me each day just to put one foot in front of the other. I most surely would have given-up by now if I relied on my own strength. His grace is sufficient!